Of Gratitude for the year 2021

I started this year on my knees, yes, literally, in prayer. Coming from 2020, I was so drained, physically, emotionally, spiritually and psychologically. I had so little left in me and of me that I knew only God could strengthen me and the verse that came so clearly in my mind was 2 Corinthians 2:9 ‘Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love me.’ I held on to this verse all year long and heavens, has He come through for me. In February, just after my birthday, I wrote this post about it as a reminder to myself, of this verse, and the Lord’s promise to me. It was a reminder for me to stay grounded in Him and that no matter what to not give up in the year 2021.

And I write this blog post as a testimony to His works, God is faithful and He will come through. I have so many things to be grateful for this year, I have seen God’s hand in my life like never before and I want there to be a record of it, not for God, because God needs no reminders, but for me to always remember His faithfulness and goodness to me. On 21 February, a Sunday, I had slept in and when I woke up, I wrote the following note:

“Keep track of what the Lord is doing for me in 2021……it will be a testimony. I have slept in and woken up e (I think I meant 3) times into the morning hours and I heard on my mind “God will answer your prayers luxuriously and fairly”, May your will be fone (sic) Lord”

Truth is, I forgot all about this note, wrote it while half asleep, thus the typos LOL and it wasn’t until I had to change phones earlier this month as mine was having issues that I found this note and I can truly say that the Almighty has come through for me in ways I could never have thought possible. He has stretched my imagination in ways I never knew before. I want to count my blessings one by one but that would be super long post so I will summarize but in my own little book, I will count them and write them down one by one, of those I know and be even more grateful, for those I know nothing about that the Lord has done. It’s not been all smooth sailing though, some of what God had to allow was hard and painful but it was to make me stronger and I am grateful for that too. 

So, in 2021:

1. I have learnt to be grateful for everything. Hard, easy, happy or sad or in between, to just be grateful. It may not always be how I want it to be but when I am grateful, I see it from a different perspective
2. I have learnt to pray and let go of things, this is a hard one because I like thinking I am in control of certain things. Truth is, there is actually very little as human beings we have control over and that illusion of control hurts as sometimes when things do not go the way we though they should. I pray, leave it in God’s hands and what will be, will be
3. I have begun to find my voice and to use it in small ways, I realized this year, that while I thought I was a bold woman (and I think there was a time that I was), over time I had become very timid and was afraid of the power of my voice and my experiences. I had hidden and shrunk myself for so long, I didn’t even recognize me anymore. This year, that has changed quite a bit as I come out to embrace who I am and hopefully find who I am meant to be
4. I have begun to let go of shame and to stop seeing my weaknesses as bad things. I am only human and while I have made many, many, mistakes, they do not have to define me, I can take responsibility for what has happened knowing it cannot be changed and the only direction to go, is forward. I know better, time to try and do better, one step at a time, one day at a time
5. I am learning that to truly have authentic relationships, be it with friends, colleagues or friends, I have to be vulnerable. For a while in my life, I had locked myself in and built walls up so high that even my friends had no idea how to get through to me. I was convinced I was protecting myself from getting hurt but truth is I was also preventing myself from forming true bonds of friendship with others. As I have slowly opened my heart back up again, I have found people who have loved and embraced me as I am and it is such an amazing feeling. I have also only just begun to discern that you can care about some people but have to let them go. And that sometimes, to accept people as they are, not as I want them to be. A big part of this has been learning to put boundaries, know what I am willing to accept and what I am not, and knowing that boundaries are a good thing, a needed thing, for any healthy relationship.
6. I am learning that some experiences I thought were unique to me actually are not, that I can never know anyone’s stories unless I truly listen and that we, as people have so much more in common than we know. Often, we hide away, feeling shame and anger about stuff that has happened to us and then learn that others have gone through it as well and have found a way to figure it out or that they are still struggling with it but either way, it is not unique to us
7. I am learning to follow my dreams, those dreams have been placed inside me for a reason, I will follow them and hope that they will lead me to exactly where I am meant to go to fulfill my purpose in this life

These are my key takeaways and I believe it is the grace of God that has opened my eyes, my heart and my paths, I am grateful, infinitely, for good health and provision, for strength and grace, for my family and my friends. I am grateful for strangers who have appeared in my life when I needed them most. I am grateful for the support I have received far and wide and just the love, the love that I see every day in all I do.

What are your key take-aways this year? Write them down, remind yourself of all the blessings you have had this year and if it has been a tough year, remind yourself what you have lived through and that you are still here and keep going, it will get better.

My prayer for you is that 2022 is a year filled with blessings and God’s grace for you and your loved ones in all areas of your lives. May you see His hand in every way you need.

Have an unforgettable year ahead! Happy new year 2022!!